Saturday, April 9, 2011

The Parish Priest

If the Parish Priest preaches for over ten minutes, he is long-winded.

If his sermon is short, he didn't prepare for it.

If the Parish funds are low, he is a poor businessman.

If he mentions money, he is money mad.

If he owns a good car, he is worldly.

If he doesn't, he is a disgrace to the Parish.

If he speaks freely to his parishioners, he is a flirt.

If he doesn't, he is snobbish.

If he is jovial, he is light-headed.

If he is serious, he is proud and unapproachable.

If he has raffles and drives, he is bleeding the people.

If he doesn't, there isn't enough social life in the Parish.

If he takes time in Confession to help sinners, he is too long.

If he doesn't, he is not a good advisor.

If he starts Mass on time, his watch is fast.

If he starts Mass late, he is holding up the Congregation.

If he redecorates the Church, he is spending too much money.

If he doesn't, he is letting it run down.

If he is young, he is not experienced.

If he is old, he should retire.

If he dies, "You'd think he would have taken better care of his health.

"Please pray that your Parish Priest has the courage, strength and grace to stand up under the strain of shepherding a flock in our present day "culture of death." Additionally, pray that he knows, lives, and teaches the truth of the Faith.